yesterday

...all my troubles seemed so far away.

ok, first of all - i know i keep falling back on songs to express myself which sure, is cheesy as all fuck, but it's just the way my brain works. shogenai.

so anyway, yesterday was brilliant. absolutely perfect.

early in the morning, roused by the time zone shift and good old-fashioned xmas morning excitement, i awoke and stoked the fire whispering and slumbering in the fireplace at the foot of my hide-a-bed. i then spent the day as self-designated keeper of the fire. i don't think i'm a pyro, but i love tending to fires. the art of keeping the flames dancing slowly and steadily (no need for the kind of bonfire that may impress but will also make all the guests sweat, ick), without resorting to my father's barbaric kerosene or logs-wrapped-in-paper/firestarter-for-idiots things just really, really appeals to me. so every so often throughout the day, i moseyed over to stick my proverbial hand in the fire and make warmth for my family. nice.

late in the afternoon i sat at my parents' cro-magnon computer conveying thoughts to my silent audience when my sister and family arrived. it was so fucking nice to hear, immediately upon entry, my nephew Jake's voice calling out "where's auntie kaen?" (insert big fucking grin here.) and as a side note, allow me to share how much i just love those two words together, the sweet innocence of "auntie" with the badass funkster "kaen" is pure poetry to me. hm, i wonder if i should start getting people to call me that!? heh.

feeling sore and sated around the carcass-littered table, we talked about.. oh, all kinds of things. the kind of family banter that not once slipped into bitterness or unforgotten trespasses (thank fuck!), but frolicked in anecdotes and memories. my sister was talking about Jake's letter to santa, proudly beaming that he'd included what she wanted. he is, indeed, a very sweet kid - even if he does insist on doing his hair like my dad's (crew cut), poor duckling. ah well, it's sweet i guess that he idolizes his grandfather. (incidentally, my younger nephew Dylan is also great, very sweet and cute). i turned to my mom, "what were my letters to santa like?" "well actually," she replied, "this one time your father had one of your letters published in the bank's newsletter [my dad was a bank manager most of my life]. it spoke about caring for homeless and giving to those less fortunate." i'm so happy i was a sweet kid too. (grin)

later that night, somehow still conscious after the turkey and excitement, my mom and i settled in to watch her all-time favourite movie: gone with the wind. (well, my dad joined too - meaning he snored quietly in his chair as we watched scarlett, rhett and ashley forge their brave new world.) i gotta admit to having a special fondness for that movie myself. surely that's the result of having watched it over 20 times in my life, courtesy of my mom (though i have been known to watch it alone if the opportunity presents itself). but i also love rhett, and scarlett a bit too. it's weird, i can't stand catherine and heathcliff, thinking they're spoiled assholes who deserve everything they get, but there's something about scarlett o'hara that just speaks to deep, secret parts of me. and rhett, well! i remember the first time i did acid. well... acid. having since gotten well and high on proper acid, i'm inclined to think i was sucking on someone's torn textbook but i was 12, whaddya gonna do. what i can say is that we were all high, not on lsd but on the freedom to do anything we wanted under the guise of being high. it was a fun night. at one point, i cornered a friend and made her recite scarlett's responses as i played rhett in one of my favourite scenes of the movie, the proposal scene. i was a weird kid..

and now it's 8:30. my bed's folded, my body showered and dressed and my thoughts recorded. a whole day stretches before me. i think it may involve a bit of boxing day shopping. (i got some cash that i'm desperate to spend on electronics - either a discman or a dvd player, how exciting!) we'll also be going to my dad's colleague's party, that might be interesting. funnily, my mom excitedly told him that "her baby" would be coming. "oh great!" he replied, "my granddaughter will be there too!" "um mark," my mom laughingly responded, "my baby's 30." "oh, well that's ok too." hee hee. and finally my parents live on the bank of a raging mini-river and park that i'm dying to explore. right now, i wish so desperately Bogey the Wonderdawg was still here, he'd love to explore it with me. (oopsies, go away moist eyes!)

for now, as i wait for the parentals to rouse themselves from their cosy slumber, i'm gonna go have some juice and try to remember that hottie i was lapdancing for in my dream last night. YUM! happy boxing day, all!